To Mr. Armitage, with love.

Reasons why I love Richard Armitage.....he looks delicious whether he's wearing:

a) a stripy sweater

b) black leather

c) a poofy cravat

d) odd facial hair

e) nothing

Okay, maybe you think I'm being superficial and immature - and you're right. Actually, the real reason I love Richard Armitage is because he's helps me learn. That's right, this man of many talents has played doctor, spy, painter, devilishly handsome man, and now it's time to add professor. Every now and again, he holds audience with his students via television or internet conferencing and delivers intriguing discourses on a diversity of topics. Past lectures include British imperialism and the private life of sperm. Most recently we've been exploring forest elephants and their fight for survival. Don't be fooled by the casual nature of the learning environment though. Just because you're wearing some sweats and your favorite bunny slippers during class time doesn't mean you can be apathetic about the assignments that follow. Each lecture is always accompanied by intense discussion with peers, and like any good school, respectful disagreement is allowed. I've been to many different schools in several different countries, and I must say, Mr. Armitage's classroom is one of the most inspiring! This really is the future of distance learning. Anyway, I invite you to take a look at some of the sample lessons below and hopefully you will join millions of satisfied students in this exciting experience!

Forest Elephants lecture:



Sperm lecture:

'Strike Back' promos.

With news coming in today that Spooks might be on the outs, I've found some promos for Richard Armitage's new project to help ease the blues. Despite its uninspired title, Strike Back throws together an appealing cast. Joining Mr. Armitage are: Andrew Lincoln, the cutie from Love Actually who has the hots for Keira Knightly; Jodhi May, the chick who throws herself off the cliff in Last of the Mohicans; and Colin Salmon, the tall, dark and handsome one from James Bond movies...yeah, that one. It's a 6 part series and, according to IMDB, David Harewood will appear in 2 episodes; call it a Robin Hood reunion....Of course you can't really have a reunion with just two people though, which is why they brought in - Sir Toby Stephens! That's right, my favorite television over-emoter will be called on to chew up the scenery for 2 episodes.

There's a tentative air date of April 2010, at which point I hope to have my thesis long behind me. Maybe I'll be in Laos if I'm lucky. In any case, not sure if I'll be able to catch it as the show will be rained down on us via Sky, a UK satellite station. Hmm, but a show about war, guns, soldiers...surely it will appeal to some fanboys out there who will help a sister out.

Hope to see more, and longer, promos soon. The first one is 15 seconds of what looks like to be Richard's showreel from Ultimate Force and Spooks. The second clip has a brief intro with a presenter and then exactly 7 seconds of flashes - mostly Richard Armitage, some Andrew Lincoln, flak jackets, automatic weapons, big army boots, and a make out scene where Mr. Armitage is dutifully getting naked. Looks like a winner!

[speechless]

Compliments of the Daily Mail in anticipation of the upcoming season of Spooks. So gratuitous.

Spooky

Lucas North will destroy you.

Looks like the 8th series of Spooks will debut sometime in October. That's - this month! Via an article uploaded on RichardArmitageOnline, there will be loads of sex and danger, just what I like in my spy show. Turns out Lucas North still has some baggage leftover from his Russian rendezvous. He also gets entangled with a blond, leggy CIA agent, which could have been me in another life, except for the blond and leggy part, and the CIA agent. Ruth comes back, which is supposed to be a big deal. I have yet to watch, well, most of the show; series 2-6 are hard to come by in these parts. In any case, let the spy games begin.

High School High

My new and embarrassing obsession - Degrassi: The New Generation. I don't usually watch teen shows I didn't watch teen shows when I was actually a teenager so I don't know what to compare it to. Freaks and Geeks, My So Called Life, Dawson's Creek, The OC?? Essentially it is a spin-off of a popular Canadian youth series that never ends. (Full disclosure, I'm not a teenager nor do I own one, and in fact, my 10 year reunion is fast approaching, which probably accounts for my recent bouts of nostalgia.) Sneer as we might at kids and their petty problems, getting laughed at, finding friends, and surviving chemistry is a big deal when you're 16. Maybe one of the reasons we have so many adult wackos is because we don't take anyone seriously in their youth. I appreciate that this show maintains a conflicted if hermetic adolescent world that is neither overly saccharine nor alienating (see Skins, which I'm also watching now). It also enjoys surprising longevity for a show of this sort which gives the characters a chance to actually grow into themselves. A lot changes in those 4 years, and it's nice to see teen characters undergo similar transformations.

On a somewhat related note, I discovered the Dear Sister phenomenon thanks to a Degrassi parody of the episode where Jimmy gets shot. The whole bit is hilarious, so inspired by that and Huffington Post's useless poll of the day, here are my top SNL digital shorts (no links because I don't have access to Hulu).

1. Dick in a Box
2. Iran So Far
3. Motherlover
   
4. Dear Sister
5. Natalie Raps

Merlin returned for a second season with a small splash, according to the viewer ratings. I thought the first episode was fair. Silly BBC family fare with high production values have become my comfort food, so I did enjoy it, but my criticisms from last season remain. Bradley James struts like a 21st century jock in chain mail, Katie McGrath needs to move her face, and the stories generally could benefit from more emotional depth. I think it's missing what Richard Armitage brought to Robin Hood - a villain with an occasional conscience. Merlin lacks strong actors and characters with any nuance. Anthony Head and Richard Wilson are of course up to par in acting ability, but there's nothing satisfying about their characters. Uther (Head) will always be a model noble, erring on the side of righteousness more often than not - except in matters of sorcery. So too does Gaius (Wilson) rarely venture from his affable, wise old man role. Nevertheless, I hope a couple plot strands will inject some intrigue. Gwen (Angel Coulby) and Arthur (James) get things warmed up, Morgana (McGrath) explores her own powers, and boy Mordred makes another appearance.

Other tv news...looking forward to the return of SNL, rather Ryan Reynolds' guest turn...Colbert and Stewart are finally back from their 3 week hiatus...zero opinion on Emmys because if I watch American shows, I'm always several seasons behind at best...just started season 2 of West Wing. I do intend on keeping up with a couple shows this fall, however. Glee already occupies my Wednesday nights, and in the next couple of weeks we'll see Flashforward with Joseph Fiennes and John Cho (romancing Gabrielle Union - guaranteed to be the hottest couple on network tv) and Three Rivers with Daniel Henney. Of the two, I'm actually looking to the former for the content. The latter is mostly for extra eye candy.

The end is near.

Haven't had a chance to catch the latest Robin Hood but early word is that things are tumbling to a spectacular climax, as promised by Richard Armitage. The fangirls (more like housewives) are distraught over what they assume to be the impending death of dear Guy of Gisbourne. Well, if Richard Armitage is on the outs, that'll save me a good 13 hours next year. Anyway, the last two episodes will be aired the following Saturdays.

Meanwhile, there is one notable departure, and it's not Jonas Armstrong, at least not on the 'notable'. We've just learned that Allan-a-Dale, portrayed by the better Armstrong - Joe, will be offed in the next episode, though it's still unknown if he will be stabbed, burned, hanged, pierced, drowned, buried, suffocated, drawn and quartered, tossed over a cliff, or thrown into a vat of burning tar. Nevertheless, this will leave an unfortunate gap in the Nottingham lineup as he was one of the more dynamic members, from the moment he tried to save his own skin in the first episode to his traitorous turn in the second season to his eventual return to the Robin Hood fold. Hopefully this will free him up for better projects, preferably something with snappier dialogue - though he did get some choice lines in the first two seasons - and more screen time. Fare thee well, Allan-a-Dale.

Hoodies

Writers of Robin Hood, you do sometimes shock me. The series has managed to rescue itself from the pits of dulldom and is crescendoing into a fine finale. Three more episodes left for Jonas Armstrong, who plays Robin Hood, to go out with a bang as this is his last season. Fans are guessing that Clive Standen may take over as a new Robin Hood. He appears in the next episode (S03E11) and looks to remain through the end of the season. Not a bad coup if you want to get recommissioned; Richard Armitage and Clive Standen will make many mothers happy. Here's an interview with the BBC on his upcoming role.

Meanwhile, this week's episode was mostly flashback to Guy and Robin's childhood. Episode 9 ended with Guy's escape into the forest so he's still running around like a crazy man when the story opens. He bumps into Robin and the two are about to slice each other to bits when they're suddenly downed by poison darts. When they awake, a robed man schools them in their personal history. When Guy's father, Roger of Gisbourne, dies in the Holy Land, his French mother, Ghiselaine, is left lady of the manor, a move that irks the local bailiff who'd like this opportunity to steal the lands. Malcolm of Locksley rebuffs the bailiff and voices his support for Ghislaine - because he's secretly bedding her. But when Roger returns unexpectedly (he was only captured), things go to the shits. For one, his wife's pregnant with Malcolm's child, and two, he's kind of a leper. Not exactly a great homecoming. His son, meanwhile, is getting upstaged by local brat Robin, Malcolm's son. Robin is a wimpy showboat who almost gets Guy hanged to save his own skin.

When Roger is forced to leave town because of his leprosy, Malcolm and Ghislaine plan a quick wedding for the sake of their child, their lands, but mostly their reputations - something that doesn't go down well with the kiddies. Guy is generally upset at his parents for letting things unravel without any resistance and Robin just gets another excuse to whine. On the wedding day, Roger once again returns unexpectedly to reclaim his wife, Robin cries 'Leper!' in a crowded village, and Guy faces off with his future step-father. Needless to say, things go down in flames, literally. Roger, Ghislaine, and Malcolm get trapped in a burning house as their children look on. After everything's been properly toasted, the bailiff runs the Gisbourne children out of the village and almost does the same to Robin. Luckily, our golden boy pays a visit to his mother's grave and everything is illuminated; he rushes back to the village, shoots a few arrows, and declares himself protector - and he's only 10. What ambitions! Fast forward to present day. The robed man reveals himself to be Robin's father who apparently escaped the fire. He appeals to his son and Guy to save their brother who is holed up in York, waiting to dangle. In a classic case of shoot and run, Malcolm hits them again with poison darts and flees the scene. When the boys finally come to, they decide to run off together into the sunset, which is in the direction of York.

The introduction of another love triangle is not the most original route, but I think the writers did a decent job of piecing together a back story that fit into the general arc of the entire series. The episode itself was not the most compelling but it managed to be both functional and emotional, whatever you take that to mean. There was a good balance of plot devices, to be born out in next week's show (bringing Robin and Guy together, rescuing their brother with Isabella on their heels, collaborating with old enemies, possibly paving the way for a new Robin), and of characterization. This episode fills some of the character gaps previously alluded to but never addressed, especially with Guy. We know that he has some capacity for love and warmth - and not just because he's played by Richard Armitage - but that he's also inhibited by an overwhelming insecurity and sense of personal injustice. Guy's so grisly that he's never come off as one who enjoyed being evil for its own sake, unlike the Sheriff or Prince John; he'd just as well be the good guy if that meant power. And as if they needed more people to sympathize with Richard Armitage Guy, we finally get evidence of a man who got shafted by life, someone who was generous and dutiful but who loses his parents, his family's land, and gets kicked out of town. It alters our perception of the Robin-Guy relationship but I think more interestingly, it reveals a lot about Isabella and her character.

A last note on the acting. Richard Armitage manages to turn Guy into a sympathetic anti-hero you'd take home to mom, except that he kills people. Jonas Armstrong though.....I don't know, I've tried to give the guy a chance, 3 seasons' worth, but it's not working. He needs to demand a refund from RADA. Maybe it's just this show - I haven't seen his other work - but he has a total of 2 expressions: toothy grin and furrowed brow - which substitutes for angry, frustrated, sad, confused, and stern. He's not an entirely bad actor but I don't think I'm off base for expecting greater depth from the main character. Most of the time, Robin comes off pretty flat. For example, when the hooded man reveals himself to be Robin's dad, you'd expect a number of conflicting emotions to manifest at once. The joy of rediscovering his father must contend with the overwhelming sense of betrayal and abandonment, besides all of which he must reconcile with his father's relationship with Guy's mother and the fact that his brother is about to die. It seems, however, that Mr. Armstrong is only capable of handling one emotion at a time; he is disgusted with his father then seems to forgive him then is crying in his father's arms. Again, he's not terrible but he's not exactly subtle, which can be distracting when he's paired with better actors. His chemistry with the other outlaws is more palatable, however, though some also belong in the 'better actors' category. Because there's less antagonism, because Jonas-as-Robin doesn't have to juggle the archetypical good guy with the emotional nuance of a 'real' person??

The day before the 20th anniversary of Tiananmen

The obsession continues.......At least the tv show that started my Alex Fong episode (浴火鳳凰 or Phoenix of the Ashes) is finished with his storyline. I think his character got blown up in a train. Pity. I think Shawn Yue kind of takes over from there. My life was already a certifiable mess when I was just interested in Richard Armitage, but now I have to toggle between the two.

Speaking of.....Over the weekend I caught the latest Robin Hood. Sometimes the show actually impresses. Something to do with expectations? I've concluded that this would be great to watch with the kids, if I had any. But it's still miserable to sit through on occasion. I think this season's suffered because of the change in cast; it's trying to reorient itself without a leading character while still maintaining continuity between this and the previous two seasons. I thought series one segued well into series two but the third has been lacking direction. Also we might attribute this to my watching solely for actors rather than any perceptible story, but again, because there's less story to watch for. The first two seasons had a good combination of sheer plot and action combined with some really intriguing characters. The ambiguity of Guy and Allan balanced the moral absolutism of most of the other characters. And their shifting loyalties were well-integrated with the plot. Guy is definitely less interesting this time around and Allan and most of the gang are all but invisible. Isabella has been a bright spot but I think the writers jerk her around from one extreme to the other so much that she loses a lot of nuance. I was looking forward to Friar Tuck as well, but he's disappointed so far, through no fault of David Harewood.

In any case, I write this because I thought that last weekend's episode returned to some of the emotional sophistication of the last two seasons. (Did I just use the word sophistication with Robin Hood?) It was nice seeing hints of goodness in Guy, and this is where Richard Armitage gets to show off that LAMDA training, or talent, whichever route you want to go. Being a baddie can be fun - see Toby Stephens who has been deliciously evil throughout his run. But the show has been lacking emotional traction since Guy's descent, so his relationship with Meg, a fellow prisoner played by Holliday Grainger, was refreshing. Actually, the interaction between Guy, Meg, and Isabella was challenging in that it gave substance to the whole sibling squabble. Previous episodes saw a duplicitous Isabella trying to stick it to her bastard brother, but their exchanges often felt like a ping pong match with nothing to really ground each other's accusations. The unexpected arrival of Isabella's husband and the ensuing chaos, however, gives new life to this relationship, particularly as Isabella is confronted with Guy's sympathies towards Meg, who tries to spring him from the dungeon after he demonstrates civility, even kindness, to her. (Side note: I thoroughly enjoyed Holliday Grainger's performance and hope to see more of her in the future. Which will probably happen because she's appeared in everything, including Merlin and Demons. I didn't particularly care for her in those roles but she was quite affecting as a headstrong but somewhat innocent girl here.) I'm at last looking forward to the next few episodes where it is revealed that Bobbin and Guy are brothers in one way or another. There will be some flashback sequences next week, so this should again give some emotional complexity to season, however belated.

Since I started the night obsessed about Alex Fong, I should end there too. His new movie comes out end of July, I believe. It's called 竊聽風雲 (Overheard) and also stars Lau Ching Wan, Daniel Wu, and Louis Koo. I'm excited about at least one of those actors. The movie's about stock traders and corruption, both things near and dear to Hong Kong. Presser the other day. The question everyone's asking: Why is Louis Koo in shorts? Or why such a flat title? Or why don't they make awesome thrillers with strong female characters in Hong Kong?

This looks like an unhealthy amount of testosterone.

'George Clooney throws you a wink and you leave your brains at the door.'

O-M-G. I just caught Sir Richard Armitage in the Wednesday slice of BBC's Moving On series, 'Drowning Not Waving'. There are 5 in all, I think, just short 45 minute sets shown each afternoon this week. It was the first one I'd watched though I'd heard that the others were fantastic. The general line is great writing matched by great acting. How comforting that solid storytelling is still appreciated. I hope the Beeb takes notice and commissions more work that exercises our intellectual and emotional capacities rather than stuff that exercises the CGI department.

Today's edition featured Mr. Armitage as John Mulligan - the kid voted 'most likely to end up in jail' by his high school class but who seems, 20 years later, more like the kid 'most likely to be a millionaire'. Big John Mulligan has landed himself a profitable gig in real estate, and some devilishly good looks. When he comes knocking on old classmate Ellie's door, she's a bit taken, as we all would be if Richard Armitage came calling. Turns out he wants to help her out of a property jam; the girl is stuck in a big pile of debt poo and needs to unload her devalued house. Mr. Mulligan shows an interest in house and lodger, and a swank dinner, some fish and chips, and a few Budweisers later, things look grand. Ellie, played by Christine Tremarco, indulges her best friend, also an old classmate, in the new relationship. Oh, but things soon go to shits. Her friend Maria gives John a proper verbal beatdown, much to the anger and confusion of Ellie. Maria soon reveals that John is not a posh real estate tycoon but in fact a dirty drug dealer. Damn. Ellie confronts John about his hobby/business, and accusations go into overdrive. Eventually, she has to decide whether to side with her best friend or her bed friend, and his money.

I'll ruin the ending and say that John planted drugs on Ellie who in turn gets the bastard locked up. The final scene is in-tense! Not because anyone's shouting or squirting tears. Quite the opposite. The two sit there, under the eye of a guard, and quietly try to sort out this sludge of betrayal and guilt they've landed themselves in. It's almost as if they are trying to outdo each other, trying to come out on top in spite of it all. For John, he's satisfied with an honest accounting for his actions, whatever side of the moral divide they fall on. Meanwhile, Ellie wraps herself in a guise of virtue and incorruptibility, somewhat unwilling to acknowledge her own complicity. They finally part, each a little vindicated, a little satisfied, if uncomfortably so. But if they emerge redeemed, they also can't escape coming off as losers. There's a sense that neither really gets it; John may absolve himself of a guilty conscience and pride himself on his self-sufficiency, but at the end of the day, he's still a drug dealer. And Ellie can stick it to John now that she's helped put him away, but he indicts her too, reminding her that she's been rescued by the same drug money.

Credit goes to the writer for a very tight script, and to the producers for holding the line. An extra hour could have been squeezed out of this story, but the shorter time slot pushed things forward. The last scene was especially choice, for some of the reasons I listed above. Of course, credit also to the prime acting. Richard Armitage stuns again. The ladies on his fan forum positively flipped and I think a good number are still passed out in a puddle of their own drool. The way he reflects the ambiguities of this character reminded me in some ways of his creepy role in Between the Sheets. In both instances, the characters are juggling two very different personas, one which they actively craft for public consumption as it were and the other which they are keen to suppress. I rather like him taking on the John Mulligan type of baddie. He's much more devastating here than as Sir Guy of Gisbourne in Robin Hood, though maybe that's because I don't often come across insecure leather-clad jackoffs with greasy hair and a huge sword. But he also had a capable foil in Christine Tremarco. Though I'd never seen her work, I really enjoyed watching her here. She has a way of hinting at her character that catches you from all sides. During their first dinner, Ellie is cautious, skeptical but intrigued and a bit flirtatious for the same reasons. The last moment when she looks at John and finally walks away is equally textured, and you're not quite sure what to finally make of this relationship. They start off two fractured characters and end two fractured characters. What a way to start off the next chapter of one's life.

Thank you once again, British taxpayers!

(George Clooney does nothing for me, but if Richard Armitage gave me a wink, I'd puddle.)

The TV BAFTAs v.2009

UPDATE: Ahh, Richard has appeared, presented, and left. The Armitage Army/Spooks boards will be quieted now. Time for some sleep.

***
I now understand the allure of Twitter. It's meant for things like updating sports scores and red carpet sightings. Not to be used by politicians to feign coolness and twit twatty jabs at one another. So I've been refreshing my pages every few minutes to get updates. Rubbish. How early 2000s of me.

They've given about half the awards, and the first one out - Best Drama Series. Result...Spooks lost! :( Admittedly expected because Wallander had the hype. I guess if The Wire never won an Emmy, we can live with great shows getting shafted. Anyway, there are more important things in life. I'm waiting for Richard Armitage to present an award but not sure how much longer I can hold out. Rupert Penry Jones has had his go. The things I want to say about him, and the presenters in general, must be put in context with the tone of the show and Graham Norton's Letterman-like performance. But I'm tired, so these thoughts will have to come once I've got my 8 hours.

Bits, Bobs, and BAFTAs for 4.26.09

Watching: Taye Diggs in Wicked
Listening: Taye Diggs in Wicked

News of the Day:

• UK's rich list takes a hit. I'm feeling punchy.
• Twitter + politicians.
• A longer than necessary article dissecting artistic achievement and beauty.
• Interesting commentary from Independent about US television's golden age (that would be now) and how Brit tv compares.
• Juice. Behind the Music: X Factor.
• What is wrong with real British spies?! Another major fuck up. Lucas North, show 'em how it's done.
• Whew. "Bob the Builder's close shave with the Village People."
• Eton opens its doors for the poor black kid. Good idea, bad idea?
  

TV BAFTAs are tonight! Richard Armitage and Hermione Norris are slated to present. French and Saunders are up for a special award so perhaps a little Harry Jasper Kennedy action? Also, Spooks is up for best drama series. If they don't win, I hope they send in Lucas North to set things right. No one seems to think it will, but The Guardian is a fan.

Meanwhile, the preview for episode 6 of Robin Hood looks...good. Richard Armitage and Toby Stephens? That's somewhat indulgent.

Bits, Bobs, and a Badass for 4.22.09

Listening: Pray-as-you-go podcast by the British Jesuits

News of the Day:

• Is college worth it? I'm having second thoughts, and so is my bank account.
• All you need is love, love is all you need - says the Archbishop of Wales. (And sex ed.)
  
• Higher taxes = brain drain? Are we talking about the bankers who fucked up the financial system because I'd say good riddance!
• Big Ag criticizes Michelle Obama's organic garden. Piss off, Big Ag.
• Oh shit! 1 in 10 gamers are 'pathologically addicted'! How about general internet addiction? Where is our patch?
• Wait, who needs a patch when you have friends to help improve your health?!
• House Hunters: Ants Edition.
• NYT reviews State of Play. Ben Affleck in a role originated by David Morrissey? 2 hr shot of a 6 part miniseries? Here's an adaptation that has s-u-c-k-s written all over it.
• How come the US can build space ships and send people to the moon - but we can't increase the bloody high school graduation rate so that we can keep building shit?
• The President says: volunteer.
• Facebook Causes - another useless application. How is asking kids to click on a 'cause' a smart way to raise money or awareness? Oh...it isn't.
  

Star Trek
I don't even like Star Trek, but I do like hot guys in uniform and hot chicks in minis. So I'm am disturbingly psyched about this movie, and to celebrate, here are 3 articles from The Times. 5 star review. Star Trek for a new generation. Star Trek for an Obama generation. Excessive, yes. Movie better be good.

Hugh Jackman
Um, the veins actually pop out of his biceps. I don't know if that's healthy, but does it really matter when you are Wolverine and hot? Methinks no. To celebrate, zero articles from The Times and 1 interview (in 2 parts) from Jonathan Ross.

Richard Armitage (or Mr. Hugh Jackman lookalike, as my friend says)
Ha! He gets his own section today. There is no real news. I just wanted to report that after a painful 2 week hiatus, grisly Guy of Gisbourne is finally coming back in this weekend's episode 5 of Robin Hood. Also, previews are up for episode 6 which marks the debut of Sir Toby as the wretched Prince John, because apparently Toby Stephens can only be cast in roles that require sneering.

The python ate my homework.

I'm sleep deprived, which usually means I can watch youtube for hours. So I was reading about the Hillsborough tragedy and ended up watching a documentary. Really sad. Then I saw another article on BBC about a man who wrestled a python for 3 hrs and then bit it after the bastard took the fight up a tree. Pythons are mean motherfuckers. So I watched some python eating animals 5x as big videos. There was a really good one that showed it eating a deer or gazelle, something with antlers. That is insanity. It also showed how the jaw/head is made of multiple parts so that it can swallow a boar or something. I also watched a really old black and white clip from some crazy safari like it was out of a Kipling novel. There was a python and lion were engaged in a monster battle. (Lion won.) I can only take so many crazy animal films though, so I watched some Richard Armitage to calm myself down, though he obviously has the opposite effect. I ended up watching some clips from Robin Hood, and I would just like to say that Lucy Griffiths is a little girl to Richard Armitage's Guy of Gisbourne. What's creepy is not his guyliner but the fact that he wants to bed someone half his age. I thought the show was supposed to be age appropriate.

'Between the Sheets' on Easter. Naughty.

Watching: North and South
Listening: the whirring of my computer
Reading: newspapers and news magazines and news blogs because I'm a news whore

News of the Day:

• Happy Easter!!!

Right, there's no real news of the day. It's quite late and I'm tired. Since Lent is over, I indulged in some youtube and tv. :( But now I have ~500 words to write before I can call it a night. Time was wasted on the following: random Chinese music videos, random Richard Armitage clips from Spooks, et al. But my real discovery was a tv show Mr. Armitage did some time ago called Between the Sheets. It's about tangled sex lives, billing itself as a grown-up conversation about the real issues complicating today's sexual relationships. Mr. Armitage plays Paul, a youth offender officer, who is in a relationship with Alona, a sex therapist to the other main couples of the show. (This is more of a subplot - but a zexy one.) Shit goes down when Paul is accused of having sex with one of his underage charges and Alona isn't sure whether or not she believes his denial.

So here are the 6 lengthy clips that some wonderful person has edited onto youtube. Thoughts below.

Shoddy dye job, super creepy facial hair.

So that was mucho disturbing. I'm going to blame tonight's lack of productivity on the fact that I'm still reeling from this revelation. I've only seen what's on youtube but if you read the comments, apparently Paul agreed to oral sex with the girl, after denying anything more than a second of wanting to kiss her. The shock isn't what he did so much that he managed to get away with the deception. Creepy, creepy bastard. The worst of it is, I really don't want to think of someone with Richard Armitage's face as a sex offender!! Alas, the perils of acting. Anyway, two thumbs up for a stellar performance. The man is this side of awesome.

(I did try to erase this Paul character from my brain so I popped in ol' North and South instead. Ahh, Thornton. Feel free to love and possess me.)

Oh, I do have a Robin Hood update. Guy is apparently on hiatus for the next two episodes (S03E03-04) so nothing to indulge in really, though I'm a mild Joe Armstrong fan and I find David Harewood intriguing. Episode 2 was ~mehmeh~. I've concluded that I really can't enjoy the show because I'm caught in the middle of the two main demographics they're aiming for. I'm not 10, though my interests often indicate otherwise, nor do I have a 10 year old to enjoy it with. So it's hard not to be cynical about a show that I usually watch whilst hunched over a computer screen in my mini-room and that features some, quite frankly, shitteous dialogue. The Robin Hood world doesn't claim the most elegant of speakers for sure. And none of the many themes and undercurrents of the show really impress on me; again, probably because I'm at least twice the age of half the viewers. Love? Mr. Thornton cures that. Adventure? I have a couple months to write 2 chapters of my thesis. Stealing from the rich and giving to the poor? In America, we steal from the poor and give to the rich, so that also qualifies as 'adventure'. Nevertheless, looking forward to Guy's return in another week's time. Hope Prince John (Toby Stephens) will string along.

Bits and Bobs for 3.30.09

Watching: n/a (Lent)
Listening: Here Come the Irish by Cathy Richardson
Reading: AfroAsian Encounters, eds Heike Raphael-Hernandez and Shannon Steen

News of the Day:

• Nutt-y woman's house invaded by squirrels.
• Speaking of nuts, Glenn Beck is crazy in every language.
• Pay for your tv shows. (But please let me keep watching Comedy Central for free!)
• Dominic West says UK tv sucks. But you guys gave us The Office and Life on Mars!
• Chicago doesn't want the Olympics. Which makes sense because they already have Barack Obama.
  

TVLand:

Despite having largely given up television for Lent (read: youtube and youku), I managed to sneak a peek at a few shows. Two more weeks of swearing off the hard stuff in the name of God, many more months in the name of my still sparse thesis.

The Wire starts its BBC run this week. Television snobs turn up their noses at the plebs who are just now discovering this masterpiece of corruption, violence, addiction, and general ineptitude. An American tragedy, indeed. **Okay, I confess I have not seen it. But I've also been abroad and HBO-less. (For the record, Dominic West has been on my radar since that odious Midsummer Night's Dream adaptation, an effort sullied by those occasional American 'actors'.)

Horne and Corden - shitteous!!! A opus of inanity. The penis on the roof is funnier, and more mature, than this assault on the eyeballs. All you need to know is that James Corden is fat and Mathew Horne is slightly effeminate. I forced myself to laugh one time because of my now very residual affection for James Corden from History Boys. Lesbian Vampire Killers, their new flick? I'd rather watch Tom Cruise. Happy Lent, boys - I will absolve them of their sin if they watch their own show 100x and promise never to venture into sketch again.

Robin Hood returns not so merrily. When we left them in the Holy Land, Guy of Gisbourne had just plunged a broadsword into Maid Marian's tum. Ouch. But she still hung on long enough to cough up some marriage vows and sweet nothings. But now Robin is pissed and Guy needs to get himself to an AA meeting, and a barbershop. Basically, Locksley sucks. Will the arrival of a few hot chicks and a black Friar Tuck liven things up?? 12 more episodes to find out. Re the criticisms over our improbably kick-ass Friar Tuck - get over it because y'all didn't complain when the Holy Land looked like Tatooine. It's a bloody tv show about a guy who, in past incarnations, wore green tights and was a FOX (the animal, not the woman).

The Great Sperm Race is the first show I've watched narrated by Richard Armitage (see above, Guy of Gisbourne). What can you say about a documentary that inflates the Gherkin (the bullet building in London) into a giant testical, casts thousands of actors in white sweats as human-size sperm, and compares the female reproductive parts to various natural terrain? Entertaining, but not quite as romantic as say Richard Armitage expounding on trade and production in North and South.

I'm not a vampire-werewolf-ghost fan, so Being Human appears on my radar only because of Russell Tovey (the werewolf), another History Boys alum. I'll offer some cerebral praise. Spot-on acting, engaging characters, wide appeal bereft of obvious pandering and appeals. There are enough plot twists (episode and series) to push the story forward but never in ways that compromise the organic growth of the characters.

Anatomy of an Obsession

When there's not much to write about.....how I became an avowed Richard Armitage fan.

After perusing the fan forums, I conclude that I'm not entirely off the deep end, though admittedly more delusional than your average television viewer. Still nuts enough to write an entire blog post about an actor though, as if obsessing alone somehow dampens the crazy factor. It doesn't.

Crazy kicked off with a random viewing of North Square, a show about some posh totty lawyers. RPJ played his usual smug, smart, but somehow lovable self. About this time, the 7th series of Spooks was starting. I gave it a go, only because of one Rupert Penry-Jones. Little did I know he was going to get blown up in the first episode, or that I wouldn't miss him at all thereafter, or that the show would be awesome. Didn't really pay attention when Lucas North was first dragged out with a bag over his head. It wasn't until the conversation in the car with Harry Pierce that the man even registered on the radar. It's the moment when Lucas says that he'd agree to play spy for the Russians and he gets this look...is he really a double agent? Verrry intriguing. While everyone else was deciding what side he's on, I was trying to figure out if this scraggly actor (his character had just emerged from 8 years of Russian imprisonment) was dangerously handsome or just a skinny dude who needed a haircut, a shower, and some chicken.

Well, we know how that one turned out. Here is where credit goes to the show for its delicious powers of seduction. Those first 60 minutes of season 7 were television crack. There were many plot and character strands that converged into one explosive climax - possible double agent, massive bomb plot, kidnapped soldier. What really hooked me though was the return of Ros, agent extraordinaire. If MI5 recruited more people like her, they wouldn't be leaving shit in cabs and trains all the time. In her opening scene, she is informed by the Section D that her mission is compromised, and she's ordered out of Russia where she's working undercover. But one phone call ain't stopping this woman. She's minutes away from reaching her contact, and when she arrives, the guy's dead. As she's searching his body for information, she spies, from a beer bottle, an assassin. Within seconds, she disposes of the guy, probably with her bare hands and without secreting a bead of sweat. In my Second Life, I want to be Ros.

But I diverge. By now, I'm hooked, and since Lucas North is kind of a major character, and because he appears tattooed, shirtless, and ripped, my curiosity is piqued. Naturally, I do a little research. I don't remember what came next - Robin Hood, Vicar of Dibley, or North and South - but the combination of those 3, plus the ongoing series of Spooks was like Charlie getting lost in the Chocolate Factory (wait a minute...). Pure imagination and sensory overload.


And that's how it happened.

Mostly Merlin and Macbeth

Watching: Merlin S01E13
Listening: Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright
Reading: Macbeth by William Shakespeare

News of the Day:

• Wrigley Field gets iced.
• Christmas deals...from the Depression.
• Pet chickens in Chicago. This wouldn't fly in Hong Kong.
• America's "red state army."
• Little Hitler wants a birthday cake too. (This one actually left me speechless.)
• Adultery cuts both ways, unless you're in South Korea.
  

Merlin concludes and my verdict - indifferent. I found nothing particularly captivating throughout the 13 episodes. The scripts were CW/WB grade, which I guess satisfied one demographic. I was reminded of Robin Hood in this regard, which is too bad because both offered a chance for me to indulge in a variety of national lore that we don't get in America. (Networks should take a cue from 1980s Disney Channel which produced "family entertainment" that still holds up.) The acting was adequate to less than impressive. Of the two leads, I preferred Colin Morgan (Merlin), maybe because Bradley James (Arthur) consistently emitted dumb jock vibes. He had his sympathetic moments (e.g. helping Mordred escape, pleading on behalf of Gwen's father) but the character remained largely unchanged from his initial appearance. And despite consistent assertions that Arthur would one day be a great king, what precisely did he do to warrant such praises? The plot may have moved merrily along, but the characters were static. (Morgana could have been an exception had Katie McGrath not overplayed the cold, bewitching stare and underplayed everything else.) I suppose the sets were a nice diversion (French castles, Welsh countryside) from your usual tv fare, but if BBC was going for mini-epic, more dynamic direction would have helped. The shots were unnecessarily flat, which kind of deflated the excitement of shooting in a truly grand castle (per the behind-the-scenes footage). Maybe it's time to admit that I'm either too old or need children to enjoy this one, but I'm a sucker so I'll probably try it again next season.

Today (or last Sunday) in music...Alexandra Burke won X Factor, which doesn't mean much to me as I eschew reality shows. (But copious thanks to them for giving us Leona Lewis, and I shame to say that I like Leon Jackson's new song; I am also a mellow sap.) Her cover of Hallelujah strikes me as heavy, but that could be because I've been listening to Rufus Wainwright's version. I like the melancholy that accompanies his lighter vocals.....but what do I know about music?

Finally in reading...I revisited Macbeth for the first time in 10 years, admittedly cheating with Sparknotes' No Fear Shakespeare. Two things encouraged this foray - my current taking to Richard Armitage, who was Macduff to James McAvoy's Macbeth in BBC's ShakespeaREtold, and more practically, tickets to the show on Sunday. I saw Scotland's Theatre Babel's staging in Hong Kong. Since I haven't been a regular theatre-goer (a matter of economics rather than a distaste for the arts), I can only say intriguing, enjoyable, with reservations. It was performed in a black box and I had a front row seat - because who doesn't want an intimate relationship with death and destruction? The intrigue came from the cozy setting, and the 40 swords dangling above the performance space, which I thought was used to mostly good effect. (It should be remembered that this was the weekend immediately following the knife swap incident in Vienna.) It was half-enjoyable because it moved at a clipped pace, having been whittled down to 90 minutes. But Macbeth is already a midgie - what else do you cut?! One might justify lobbing off 1/3 of Hamlet or King Lear but methinks Shakespeare was already quite efficient this go-around. In particular, I missed the generous interlude in Act IV between Macduff and Malcolm, which was present of course but not intact nor as grave. And I guess that's what I felt about the production overall, that it played like Macbeth Lite, which in the world of Shakespearean tragedies, seems counterintuitive.

I haven't chewed over the BBC remake, but briefly, it is a modern adaptation - in a 4 star restaurant specializing in offal delights. This will either turn you completely on or off, especially an early scene where pretty boy Macbeth plops a pig's head on the counter and quasi-caresses the thing before hacking it to delicious bits. "Joe" Macbeth is the sous chef for food celebrity Duncan (Vincent Regan). Chef Billy Banquo (Joseph Millson), maitre d' Ella Macbeth (Keeley Hawes), and head waiter Peter Macduff are also under dear Duncan's employ. That the cast is as beautiful as it is talented is, sadly, irrelevant. Here is another case of arranging pieces of plot to fit the original text; the elements are present but little else. One could say plenty about the celebrity food culture given our addiction to Food Network and its galaxy of rotund stars (minus Giada), but this is left wholly unexplored. You could easily substitute a kitchen knife fight with a California Fitness gym battle (hmm......). So again, another stripped down Shakespeare. All this leads me back to the one place that would make my teachers proud - the original text.