From a (slightly abbreviated) conversation I had last night - with my mum. Leave it to me to find a way to weave 6 uncommonly attractive men into one phone call.
"Mom, I'm crazy about a Korean singer."
"Your brother told me. I told him that's not possible because you were just obsessing over Soler last night."
"Don't worry, I'm still crazy about Soler. In fact, when I went out today, I was looking for their studio again." (It's hidden somewhere in my neighborhood.)
"So who is this new guy?"
"He's from a Korean boy band. You said Korean guys are cute so you should be happy with my choice. He can sing, he can dance, he's quiet, sweet. His English is okay too. Much better than Hong Kong pop stars these days. They're not like the older generation. Tony Leung has good English."
"Really?"
"Yeah! I'll send you a YouTube clip. I wanted to buy Duke of Mount Deer today when I went past the bookstore."
"What is that?"
"It's a wuxia novel."
"I don't read."
"I know, Mom. I'm not sure how you have a double English major daughter. Anyway, it's been made into a tv show many times. Tony Leung was in a TVB version in the 1980s. Even Huang Xiaoming was in the most recent one. Did you know he's also going to be in a new movie with my other crush, Donnie Yen."
"Who?"
"I didn't tell you about my crush on Donnie Yen?"
"Who's Donnie Yen? I've never even heard of him."
"Oh my goodness. Don't you watch Hong Kong movies? He's the top martial artist right now. Among Hong Kong martial arts legends, there's Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, Donnie Yen."
"I've never heard of him."
"Ai! His mom's a wushu sifu who helped bring martial arts to America. They moved to Boston when he was young. Then he started getting into trouble -"
"Like Bruce Lee."
"- so his mom sent him to Beijing. After his studies, he took a detour in Hong Kong on his way back to America and ended up working with Yuen Woo-Ping."
"Who?"
"Mom! He's one of the most famous action directors in Hong Kong!"
"Oh, wasn't he in a Danny Chan movie?"
"Yes! He played the goofy suitor to Paula Tsui in Merry Christmas. Anyway, they started working together and the rest is history. I'll send you a link so you can see who Donnie Yen is."
"Okay, whatever."
"Do you want me to send you the link to a music video of this Korean guy?"
"No."
Your loss, Mum, your loss. But credit to her for listening to me spout nonsense, which I've been doing since I first laid eyes on Joey McIntyre. My birthday's coming up, a reminder I need to grow up. But I'll do what I'm best at and procrastinate.
